• MissJinx@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    I’m not lgbt but when you witness first hand what people talk about when they say transgender you undertand everything.

    My cousing was born in 1990, nobody talked about it and being gay was stil a big no no, specially being the son of one of 5 brothers. I have 18 cousings and only me and 1 other are women, the rest are all men. All of us were raised together in the same way, so much so that I’m very much not girly and only tried makeup for the first time at 18.

    All that to say that my cousing was NOT influenciate in any way but he was born pretty much a girl, a LOT more girly than me. He woud sing all the little mairmaids songs, dance like he was Belle, LOVED dolls and being “mommy” etc. Mind you he was 2, 3, 5 yo. His parents put him in 10 different psychiatrists. Nothing worked (obviously). he tried hiding or even toning down but there was no way, the boy was born a princess.

    Every time I hear about gender x bio sex I remeber him He never had a “choice”, that’s what he was born as.

    I wish he had had the chance to be himself when he was young (he never changed his gender but he finally “came out” to his dad about 5 years ago)

    • Chetzemoka@startrek.website
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      11 months ago

      This was very much my experience with the trans girl I grew up with 35 years ago. From the instant she was able to express preferences (I’m talking like age 18 months to 2 years), it was all princesses and dolls and makeup and trying on mom’s high heels. We all just assumed she was a gay boy because we had never heard of a transgender person before.

      We encouraged her to just keep that behavior at home because she was bullied mercilessly for appearing to be an effeminate boy. But nothing would stop her; she was completely irrepressible.

      When in high school, she told us she was really a girl, it was like the most face-palmingly obvious thing. Of COURSE that’s what we’d been seeing her entire life. It just made sense. That’s just who she is.

    • dingus@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I don’t think witnessing it is really enough to understand it for everyone.

      For example, I don’t fit in with traditional gender norms. Yet at the same time I don’t feel like I was born into the wrong sex/gender. And if I was born as the opposite sex, I think I’d be pretty indifferent about it. I don’t really care either way for myself, personally.

      I have both transgender and nonbinary friends and I simply don’t relate to their struggles. While I don’t feel like I fit in, I don’t feel like I’m the “wrong” gender/sex either.

      I respect transgender and nonbinary individuals. And I think they absolutely deserve to live their life the way that makes them the most comfortable being themselves. But unfortunately, even witnessing this stuff fist hand doesn’t mean I’ll ever personally be able to understand gender dysphoria.

      I’m supportive, but I’ll never truly understand. But I don’t think you have to fully be able to understand to be an ally.