Qui t’autorise à me tutoyer ?

has finally arrived

Finally !

Ohhh – was trying to remember where I knew the small of your back from

Because git doesn’t require, but could definitely benefit from, empty initial commits, my go-to is:

git init
git commit -m='🌳 root commit' --allow-empty
git tag v0.0.0 -am=''
git add -A
git commit -m='✨ initial commit'
git tag v0.0.1 -am=''

which is completely Nver- and Y2K-compliant

Size is a fad. Just ask David.

Like most people who sleep with men, I think all dicks are worthy

If you have a problem with the way Jesus authored The Star-Spangled Banner, then maybe you should move to France: La Marseillaise doesn’t allude to slavery or take pride in Americans committing treason against their leader in London.

Still better than its actual etymology

What part of Montana is Missoula in?

Have you heard of Joe Biden? Well, his left eye.

Wait, has the algorithm finally begun to serve us ?!

Despite Him having:

• known you’d be born in ≈2000 years
• known He was dying for sins He defined and you commit, which He also knew and did nothing to prevent
• having had the audacity to whine to His Dad when He unal*ved both a God and Himself in an act of auto‑sui‑dei‑but-also-somehow-fili‑cide-by-cop by and through the innocent hands of local law enforcement, our boys in blue, whom I still salute when I’m driving, and while those closest to Him, who were Jewish, could do nothing but listen to the moaning you are responsible for, but which He chose to endure
• been surprised that His dad forgot about Him,

I believe He’d be surprised if there weren’t Oily/Annointed/Christ Josh/Jesus fanfics of a charismatic 33-year-old, may peace be upon Him, taking it both ends, my son.

Me and Jesus await with ’bated breath.

If US Christians are making it up as they go and seeing whatever they wanna see in the Bible, then I call upon you, my child, to announce your submission to the Parable of Jesus the Whore of the Theater and the Christ.

Whoa! I didn’t even know I could wish for such a future.

Yeah I usually run my backend in Asciidoc too. The level of its performance might surprise you.

Satan up early this morning

RIP lather

referring to exactly those crimes

Thank you for your service.

Next time someone complains about cancel culture, let’s all remember to enlighten them about Gym fucking Jordan, whose ethical bankruptcy has gone unpunished and almost seems forgotten.

That’s a typo of the cleverest variety considering the millions of human-hours of misery and self harm that occurred after

• hundreds of athletes were sexually abused at the school where he was a wrestling coach and
• Jordan became aware of the abuse, and even worse than saying nothing, he also begged victims and their families to deny it as well

In the olden days, Yahoo shuttered some of the largest digital properties on the internet with too little notice for them to be meaningfully archived (especially Yahoo Groups (easily the Reddit and Fediverse of its day) and Geocities (at a time before social media, a place to make a corner of the internet one’s own, it had mountains of longform geekery that’s now lost forever)).

Yahoo also used to be one of most widely used free email providers. Not as ubiquitous as Gmail, but definitely very popular. During that time, they had at least two – and almost certainly more than four – instances where bad actors gained access to user accounts and Yahoo failed to immediately notify impacted users.

This one time, they admitted that all their user email addresses, which then numbered in the billions, had been compromised by a years-old hack whose disclosure they seem to have withheld. The same thing happened a few months later, but affected only some email addresses. For the latter event, they were proven to have withheld discovery of the breach.

There was this one journalist whose email details they gave to the Chinese government to enable his arrest. Then they lied about it to Congress.

And while the NSA likely listens to every piece of data available to them, which trivially and almost effortlessly includes emails, and while Yahoo is one of the tech companies whose NSA PRISM membership is documented, Yahoo additionally performed scans for crime-adjacent keywords on all its users’ incoming and outgoing emails for years.