“THIS WEBSITE IS A JOKE”

Literally none of those are actually"objective"…

Yep, using it as a literal test seems to miss the point, namely that there is a significant %age of films and TV that fail to meet even that low a bar.

Normally black holes are considered to be everything up to the event horizon. E.g., from the Wikipedia page:

The size of a black hole, as determined by the radius of the event horizon, or Schwarzschild radius, is proportional to the mass, M

The term “black hole” derives from the fact that beyond a certain point light can’t escape, that point being the event horizon.