Gender: Female, Sexuality: Enigma,
Disabled and autistic as hell.
Depends. Nicer to men? Probably. Nicer to women? Hell. No.
Can’t count how many times I’ve seen people call out things like body shaming of men, but do the same thing to women and suddenly it’s a “natural expression of human sexuality.”
I suppose it’s just the end result of any community dominated by an extreme majority of men, but it sure as hell doesn’t feel good and has made me heavily consider deleting my account and just finally giving up on social media entirely.
Meanwhile I’m too autistic to tell when they AREN’T happening, and just keep talking until somebody respectfully tells me to shut up an take my turn.
When I was little, I had times where I just straight up slept at the dinner table because I refused to eat. My parents learned quickly that if they didn’t want me to starve to death, they were gonna need to make foods I actually liked.
Once they’d been doing that for a while, I got a lot more open to trying new foods, even ones I didn’t like before, because now everyone else was eating and enjoying food I didn’t have and I wanted to be a part of that. Didn’t make me automatically like everything, but it did open me up to a lot of healthier options.
I sort by active because the slower flow of content helps me avoid a social media addiction. I just check the few posts that hit the top of my feed every day, then exit Lemmy for the day.
I hate the whole “its” being converted to “it’s” no matter what thing, but what I hate more is when I teach the keyboard a word, and it STILL won’t let me use it. Taught my keyboard “that’d” and it would autocorrect it to “that’s” every time. And unlike other words, if I went back and manually corrected it back, it wouldn’t leave it, it’d force it back to “that’s” again and refuse to let me change it. Come to think of it, it did that with “it’d” to “it’s” too. Eventually I just switched to a different keyboard with much less aggressive autocorrect, since I still need the autocorrect to type with any semblance of speed due to minor coordination issues.
My old keyboard abruptly started autocorrecting more typos into what I was saying than it corrected toward the end anyway. Probably some shoddy attempt to implement AI auto correction.
All you gotta do is push the ends that’re stocking out under once it’s soft enough. No stirring necessary. I suppose you can if that’s easier for you, but I don’t bother.
Editing in real quick though, I’ve never cooked high end pasta, so maybe that’s different. I’m broke, so it’s always the cheap stuff for me
I have never stirred pasta before, and never had it stick even once. Are you sure you’re waiting for the water to reach a full boil to add the pasta? At that point that air bubbles should be knocking it around enough that you don’t have to bother.
For me, it’s the complete and total inability to focus on anything without caffeine. I can’t even do something I enjoy for longer than 10 minutes before I’m off the rails doing something completely unrelated for 2 minutes before I’m on to something else unrelated for another 2, never getting back to the original task.
Having a fixation on a hobby for me, instead of meaning dedicating myself to it, means thinking about it constantly in between goofing off, and never being able to actually get myself to do it, to my own immense frustration.
Writing is probably my biggest fixation I have, and I have dozens of 40 page long plot skeletons for series I want to write, all written a single paragraph at a time per day, and exactly one novel where the first draft is half finished after 3 years of work, and I haven’t written a single word in about a year because every time I sit down to write, I literally immediately get distracted. Forcing myself to do it in various ways instead of goofing off results in feeling horrible, and writing horrible quality writing I have to delete the next day, all because my brain could not engage with what I was doing, even though I absolutely love it normally.
And the biggest indicator that I have adhd, besides being actually diagnosed with it, is that all these issues vanish when I drink absurd amounts of caffeine. I can write and enjoy it. In fact, I can write 10,000 words in a single day and absolutely love every minute of it. Albiet, it tends to be 10,000 words into a novella I end up trashing, but that’s still productivity.
As for autism, well, I have difficulty communicating, can’t talk to somebody about anything without looping the conversation around to me (how do you even talk without talking about yourself? Still can’t figure that out,) and also have extreme sensory issues. If my hands are even slightly dry I retch, if my fingernails are too short, same thing. I also can’t be around large groups of people because it overstimulates me immediately and I forget how to everything.
As somebody who was once part of a cult, it’s just the same circus but worse.
It’s still a gradual buildup for me, and there are little pauses every time it starts over, but if I don’t have those little pauses, I get overstimulated too much and the nerves just kinda shut off for a couple minutes. There’s always an intense shock of pleasure too when it starts over, that fades away really fast, but every time it starts over again the shock is more intense than the previous time, until eventually, one of those shocks is an orgasm. I can technically have one on the lowest settings of sustained vibration too, but it’s not intense enough to give me a satisfying orgasm. The settings that just pulse regularly also sometimes work, but I prefer to have at least a second or two with the thing going full blast just because it feels good, so that’s why I use the “Morse code” setting instead. That way I get the full intensity, along with the little interruptions that prevent me from getting overstimulated.
There are people who don’t like that? Huh. That’s the only setting that works for me. Every other setting is too regular so I go numb and just stop feeling it after like 5 seconds.
Going through this right now. Don’t enjoy playing single player games much. Only usually enjoy multi-player games if I’m playing with my wife. I’m just letting it happen tbh.
Getting into tabletop games and collecting instead. Unlike video games, tabletop games come with all sorts of cool knickknacks, especially war games, and I’m finding getting to collect them and then play with the cool new things holds my interest better nowadays. Feels like it scratches the same itch as installing a thousand new mods into video games then playing for a few hours before loading it up with even more mods, but instead of mods it’s new little dudes and I get to assemble and paint them.
I have some pretty severe memory issues, but weirdly it doesn’t apply to passwords. I use different passwords everywhere, but I don’t bother with password managers. I just type random letters, numbers, symbols, and randomly capitalize some letters, then I never forget any passwords I frequently use. They’re always really long, too. I do forget ones for sites I used like once and then like a year later decided to log in again.
However, when it comes to literally any other area of my life, I’m so shit at remembering things it’s basically a mental disorder. I’ve had moments where I’ve been talking to somebody, and couldn’t remember anything in the conversation past 2 sentances ago. Hell, typing this, I keep having to reread it to remember what I already said.
I’m also fairly young, at least compared to people who’d usually be developing memory issues, but in my case it seems to be caused by the fact that I’m on 7 different meds right now, 4 of which can cause memory issues. Unfortunately unavoidable though. My doctors have tried switching me off and other meds didn’t work. The symptoms they prevent, let’s just say turned out to be a hell of a lot worse than a few memory issues.
On the bright side, my wife can keep explaining the same Warhammer lore to me over and over again and every time it’s just as new and interesting as the first time. And I can play games and read books and such for the first time multiple times. That’s something most people only wish they could do. Granted, if I do hear or see something over and over it eventually begins to stick in my head, so I can’t do it forever.
I do a similar thing to help myself get started, and the secret is it doesn’t have to be chores. Step one can be literally anything that’s easy to do that you’re not currently doing. For instance, my step one is often something as simple as talking to somebody. Then step 2 is something closer to what you need to do. Like if I’m gonna need to do something that requires more energy, my step 2 could be taking a walk, or if I can’t get myself to do that, pacing around a bit.
You just work up until doing the task you need to do becomes the natural conclusion. If my task was cleaning the bathroom, the next step after walking might be brushing my teeth, then I say “Well I’m already up and doing stuff, and I’m already in the bathroom. Might as well clean it.”
And it’s not always gonna work, which I think is okay, as long as it works often enough that my space remains livable.