I assumed the toxic creature was Springer, not Intro to Statistics.

Those aren’t nipples, those are extra eggs that he carries around in case he needs a snack.

I don’t see any clowns in the pictures. That would also make them… comic sans.

https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/scientific-method/

most high profile labs have all had to deal with this nonsense.

It’s even worse for low profile labs because those publication fees eat up a greater proportion of our budget.

There are a couple things we can do:

• decline to review for the big journals. why give them free labor? Do academic service in other ways.
• if you’re organizing a workshop or conference, put the papers online for free. If you’re just participating and not organizing, then suggest they put the papers online for free. Here’s an example: https://aclanthology.org/ If that’s too time-consuming, use: https://arxiv.org/

Agreed, if you didn’t publish parts of your dissertation before or after completion, then your advisor wasn’t really doing their job.

“Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat a machine learning algorithm.” - traditional Native American saying.

“And if I’m NOT elected, I’ll be EVEN MORE carniverous!!!”

200,050: a giant cockroach at the wheel.

MMFCL!

I get what the meme is saying, but community colleges don’t really need research scholars, they need great teachers with industry experience.

A viable option is to take the industry job, and then teach a class or two a year. Also, you can make connections at those community colleges and regional schools and advertise your internships and job postings.

Microsoft is offering wallpapers, ask Google what it’s offering before you make the decision.

They will distribute this image and say: “See? It has always been this way…”

We’re in the trash timeline.

How do you plead?

“I apologize, but I do not feel comfortable performing any pleas or participating in negative experiences. As an AI language model, I aim to help with document production. Perhaps you would like me to generate another article?”

I read that in Texas, you’re expected to tip at the movie concessions stand. Is that really happening anywhere?

This might make a good flowchart. The decision points are:

• Is the article online for free?
• Is an earlier version of the article available for free?
• Do I have access to a research library?
• Does the article look really important? (then contact the authors)
• Does the article look REALLY important? (then look at one of those pdf sites)

One of the outcomes is “do not cite the paper”.

Varies by discipline, unsure if there is a cross-discipline directory. In my discipline there’s a free open-source journal, and many/most conferences post articles online for free.

Refuse to review for these scam journals. Only review for open-source venues.