“Hi team, customers observing BigCannon is missing enemy about 90% of time since latest update. Red faction reported issue 4pm ET today and opposing Blue faction was able to re-pro. Can we get all hands on deck to deep dive and push a fix by midnight so both sides can start reliably shooting at each other again before tomorrow morning? Thanks”
before tomorrow morning?
DoD contractor: Sure can, but it will cost you huge.
(Lies about the former, 100% accurate on the latter.)
Oh good, the blight on the world that is agile continues to spread
I don’t understand how Agile became synonymous with “useless meetings.” I thought the whole point of Agile was to minimize wasted work.
Management trying to look useful
how many story point does an american need to kill an innocent person in gaza?
Giving bombs to Israel without condition is a… 6 point story I think
I think it needs to be 5 or 8 so it’s a number from the Fibonacci scale.
It is also important that there is no possible way that a story point can meaningfuly represent time.
Not very Fibi of you.
Anti Commercial AI thingy
So more meetings about meetings, a 2h daily standup, and a follow-up meeting about blockers.
Let’s make a meeting to schedule a workshop about useless meetings then. That’ll fix all issues. Oh and we need a meeting to communicate the findings. And a retro.
Do we need some tickets for that? I’ll schedule a planning.
And some emergency meetings to talk about our low velocity.
Edit: and that isn’t too far off of our “agile” work 😭
This will ultimately lead to world peace as every army is in meetings all day.
Cool
and yet y’all are also gonna keep trying to use Agile too
