I lived through that fucking decade and I think it has a lot to do with how fucked up I am today. The way my school district dealt with a kid that couldn’t sit still was to lock them in a cinder block room with nothing but a desk and a pencil. They would keep you in there until you finished whatever assignment the teacher gave you.
Then I was prescribed ritalin. I was ridiculously allergic to it and it gave me seizures. When I wasn’t having seizures I was almost catatonic which the school liked, because it meant I stayed in my chair. The school tried their best to keep me on it even though my parents were VERY unsure about the whole seizures thing and negative effects on my personality. One day I asked my mom “If I do something bad when I’m on my medicine, do I go to hell?” (I have a very religious family) and that was the push they needed to take me off it.
I haven’t sought treatment or therapy since, because of that whole debacle. Every once in awhile I think about it, but it sends me in an anxiety/ptsd spiral and I chicken out.
Hell, when I graduated, they would give you your permanent record along with your diploma on the stage. Everyone else’s was super thin, but mine was three folders about three inches thick each. I didn’t even look at it, just burned it out of shame. I’m sure it was full of “prime mover has a lot of potential” bullshit. I wish so bad that I could be normal, but I don’t think I even got a ticket for that boat before it sailed.
Sorry for the rant. Still pissed off at my school system, but not sure who to share that rage with. Fuck em all
Hell, when I graduated, they would give you your permanent record
Holy crap that was real?! I thought it was something TV shows made up to scare kids. Like, I know they keep a file on kids with important info. But every infraction or whatever is dystopian.
I also grew up in the 90s and got hit with ADD diagnosis when I was about 5 (1990). I was on Ritalin and then Adderall for years and I KNOW the dosage wasn’t figured out yet and way too high. I was much more quiet, barely had a personality and would routinely give away my lunch because I had no appetite. Eventually 5-7 years of that I started just throwing the meds away and when school found out my parents took me off them.
I’m pretty sure I still have mild ADHD and have considered getting prescribed something or talking to a doc to help but like you that shit came with scars. Early adopters for meds can have it rough.
I lived through that fucking decade and I think it has a lot to do with how fucked up I am today. The way my school district dealt with a kid that couldn’t sit still was to lock them in a cinder block room with nothing but a desk and a pencil. They would keep you in there until you finished whatever assignment the teacher gave you.
Then I was prescribed ritalin. I was ridiculously allergic to it and it gave me seizures. When I wasn’t having seizures I was almost catatonic which the school liked, because it meant I stayed in my chair. The school tried their best to keep me on it even though my parents were VERY unsure about the whole seizures thing and negative effects on my personality. One day I asked my mom “If I do something bad when I’m on my medicine, do I go to hell?” (I have a very religious family) and that was the push they needed to take me off it.
I haven’t sought treatment or therapy since, because of that whole debacle. Every once in awhile I think about it, but it sends me in an anxiety/ptsd spiral and I chicken out.
Hell, when I graduated, they would give you your permanent record along with your diploma on the stage. Everyone else’s was super thin, but mine was three folders about three inches thick each. I didn’t even look at it, just burned it out of shame. I’m sure it was full of “prime mover has a lot of potential” bullshit. I wish so bad that I could be normal, but I don’t think I even got a ticket for that boat before it sailed.
Sorry for the rant. Still pissed off at my school system, but not sure who to share that rage with. Fuck em all
Holy crap that was real?! I thought it was something TV shows made up to scare kids. Like, I know they keep a file on kids with important info. But every infraction or whatever is dystopian.
I also grew up in the 90s and got hit with ADD diagnosis when I was about 5 (1990). I was on Ritalin and then Adderall for years and I KNOW the dosage wasn’t figured out yet and way too high. I was much more quiet, barely had a personality and would routinely give away my lunch because I had no appetite. Eventually 5-7 years of that I started just throwing the meds away and when school found out my parents took me off them.
I’m pretty sure I still have mild ADHD and have considered getting prescribed something or talking to a doc to help but like you that shit came with scars. Early adopters for meds can have it rough.
I am so sorry that sounds like a fucked up childhood