It seems like all the onus is on to socialise in the meantime you are relentlessly judged for how you go about socialising or dating. I am on college right now and I am seriously struggling to make friendships. My anxiety is kinda on overdrive because of it. I am expected to know if I am welcome to come or not but if I am not supposed I am judged severely. Meanwhile there’s no one really coming up to me trying to help me. You know I’d like to just once be good enough for someone to come up to me and say that they just want to be around me. Enough of the guesswork. I am tired of it. I’m in my mid 20s just give me a fucking break at this point. So much of my “disability” would just go away if people had the decency to fucking educate themselves and expect me to know everything. I put myself out there and talk to people. I’ve done my fucking part.
You’re asking others to provide you with a social life.
I do believe that you’re trying your best, but you’re not entitled to have others want to hang out with you. If they wanted to, then you’re right and you did your part. But what if they don’t want to? Do they have to change themselves just for you to have a social life?
I’m not gonna lie, you’re entitled attitude here makes me feel like you are not pleasant to be around. I may be misreading you, but I’m getting major incel vibes. Here’s the thing: you trying to make friends doesn’t mean they have to reciprocrate.
You are not entitled to have otherslike you or want to hang out with you. Your desire for a social and romantic life is valid and understandable, but that is on your side. The world does not have to care about it, as hard as it sounds.
For what it’s worth, it took me until my mid-thirties to actually find a social circle. More than 3/4 of my life I struggled just as you. Stop expecting from the world to bend over backwards for you, work on your attitudes and on accepting that even though you gave it your best shot these people may not be friend material. If that happwns, move on.
Don’t try to hang out with people because you want to make friends. Hang out with people because you want to do something interesting. Shift your focus from making friends to simply enjoying the time. I don’t know what your interests are, but you can join a movie club if you area movie nerd, you can try geocaching if that tickles your fancy, go running… whatever activity you enjoy. Once the pressure on yourself is gone from “I have to make friends” chances are you will be much more relaxed and approachable.
People are not a tool to get a social life. A social life happens when you do things you enjoy and you find people who share that passion on the way.